Missing

It has been raining here in Jakarta since last month. And just like Manila, when it rains......... traffic worsens... hahaha... and it pours... the traffic, i mean.

Its like frogs in the forests or swamps. They go out of their holes or whatever and then they bathe in the rain while croaking. Just like the cars here in Jakarta. It seems that whenever it rains, all, i mean, all of the cars go into the streets. I dunno why. It seems that whenever it rains, they just want to go somewhere else... or maybe home. The traffic here is already bad and it becomes worse when it rains.

I really love rain. I love it when it pours. Even when it causes too much traffic here in Jakarta, i still love the rain. Whenever I am stuck in traffic, I try to write - reports, emails, or blogs. Sometimes, I play with my cellphone. Sometimes, I read a book or an e-book. I just make my time being stuck in traffic more productive than staring out the window waiting for the car to move.

The rain, at least, cools down Jakarta. They say that the "rainy" season here in Jakarta is from October to February. So, i only need to bear with the traffic whenever it rains until next week. but I still have to face it when i come back in January. So, its okay to fall, its ok to pour, its ok to rain.

for the past few months since I got here in Jakarta, i've only ridden a taxi for not more than 20 times. And every time that they ask something to me in their native language and i cannot understand, I would tell them, "Pak, saya tidak Indonesian. saya tahu Bahasa indonesia, sedikit!" --meaning, sir, i am not indonesian. i only know little of the indonesian language (Bahasa means language).

i have been trying to converse with the waiters in the restaurant at the ground floor of this apartment and because of that, i can understand some of what they are saying. mainly because ive been trying to read some books about their language and because some of their words are the same as the Tagalog words we use in the Philippines. Just like buka (Indonesian) and bukas (Tagalog) which means "Open", Mahal (same in Indonesian and Tagalog) which means "expensive" or the opposite of which is "mura" in Indonesian and Tagalog. I think the reason for this is because Indonesians and Filipinos, just like Malaysians came from the Malay Race though the Philippines has been colonized by the Spaniards, Japanese, and the Americans. While the Indonesians has been colonized by the Dutch.

One thing for sure, it is nice to know a new language especially now that I will be coming back here in Jakarta and continue to work until next June or until another opportunity comes. So, when I get back here, I will try to enroll in a class to study the Indonesian Bahasa.

argghhh!!!! I am having difficulties lately of fitting into my schedule new clients for therapy. Aside from the fact that I usually get tired easily lately.

Back in Manila, I usually work 10 hours a day, seeing a maximum of 12 clients a day. It usually works for me since my schedule has been like that ever since I started working in 2002. And I seldom feel tired!!!! I think the reason for that is that my body has been accustomed to the workload and schedule. However, when I got here in Jakarta, I only have to work like three hours a day, four at most. Lately, there has been an outpour of clients seeking therapy and I can't find a time for them in my weekly schedule especially now that I have been doing "make-up" sessions for the missed ones. And adding to the pressure is the fatigue that I feel even if its only midway through the day! It seems that my body and mind has already accustomed to the 3-4 hours a day work. And now, working the whole day (8-9 hours including the travel in the forsaken roads of Jakarta because of the traffic) it seems and feels too much for me to handle!

At least, its only two weeks more before I go back home to Manila to take a breather before going back here next year to face a full schedule every week!

Way back in Philippines, they say that if you learn how to drive around the streets of Manila, you would be able to drive anywhere in the world!

I guess the person who said that should rethink about his or her position about the matter. I personally think that one has to learn how to drive here in Jakarta so that they could drive anywhere in the world! One has to be on the lookout ALL THE TIME from his left, right, front and back for cars and especially, motorcycles!!!! In Manila, I thought, we had the many motorcycles plying the main thoroughfares. But lo and behold! There are much more here in Jakarta and the number dwarfs that of in Manila. And according to the natives here and the long-staying expatriates, the motorcycle here is the king of the road - bye to the famed jeepney in Manila! Well, aside from the number of motorcycles, the streets are becoming very crowded because of the increasing number of busways where according to the news, to encourage the car-owners to shift to public transportation. Duh! I myself would not trade the comfort of a car for a bus - most of which are not airconditioned! Since I sweat easily and I do not like "sunny" weather most of the time. And the fact that there are some people who has not yet gotten acquainted with deodorants!!! Urgghhh....

The roads here in Jakarta are also a bit hard to remember the routes one usually passes. I think its because there are tons of U-turns and "deviated" crossroads (not a straight cross!!!). One also has to make certain turnarounds in order to reach a destination instead of just going to it straight!

I guess, I'm not really a good driver - since I only knows how to drive an automatic car but do not have a license yet... hhuhuhu... so sad. I've been used to riding a car or public transportation (metro trains which are more accessible and fast as compared to cars coz of the traffic in Manila). But here, I'd rather use a car with a driver than use a public transportation. I know it can increase my fat deposits for not even walking a kilometer or two or even going up the stairs (since I use the lift coz we're staying on the 8th floor), but what the heck. Right-hand driving confuses me aside from the fact the lurking possibility of collision with the King of the Road!

Today is the first Sunday in my professional life that I worked!

Except for other Sundays where I practice my profession not to earn money but for charity's sake - free seminars for parents and other professionals and theraFREE or free therapy to underprivileged people.

The reason for working on a Sunday is that I have to do some "make-up" sessions for those missed by my clients here in Jakarta before I head back home to Manila on the 23rd of the month. That means I will be working again on the next two Sundays!

I am not used to working during Sundays because for me it is a REST day and a FAMILY day, even though my family is back in Manila. But still, I consider my Sunday as the day for myself and for the Lord. Well at least, I would still have time to go to church and hear mass since my work is only in the morning.

Hopefully, on the 18th will be the last day where I will be working on a Sunday!

I was supposed to attend mass at six in the evening today so I arranged for an evaluation of a client at four in the afternoon.

I was already near their place and I got a call from them asking if it is okay to move the evaluation at five. I told them that it is best if we could do it before five. I was not able to tell them that I had to go to mass at six. I was just thinking that I could travel in 20 minutes going to the church. so i stayed in a coffee shop slash bookstore near their place.

they called me about quarter to five and when i got to their place, they had to make me wait before the place was set up for the evaluation! argghhh!... So I ended up missing mass at church.... and i feel bad about it... and another thing that makes me feel bad is that we had agreed to start the evaluation at four in the afternoon. And about ten minutes prior to four, they would call and ask for a reschedule? duh! they are just wasting my time and come to think of it, today is a Sunday! I was just asked by a colleague of mine to do an evaluation for them of their child. hay!!!

I don't like changing my schedule on the last minute!!!

Its been a long while since I last blogged. However, I have so many valid excuses and one of them is I've been reading books! And the last two that I have finished is about a man and a dog. The first one is a memoir about him and his dog, a doberman. The second one is about a man, his family and their dog, a labrador.

The first book is entitled, "I have heard you calling in the night" by Thomas Healy. It talked about his life, how he somehow managed to get a dog despite his drinking and brawling problems. It also talked about his struggle in life together with his dog, Martin. Sure enough, we all have our ups and downs in life. And it is nice to have someone with us wherever we are in life - whether up or down. There were also instances in the story where Martin, the doberman would defend, fight and protect the author. And there was an instance where Martin was hurt by a pitbull in a fight but he emerged victorious to the expense of the pitbull.

The second book is entitled, "Marley and Me" by a man with a surname Grogan. I forgot the first name and I do not have the book with me since a friend borrowed it. Anyway, its about a couple who got a Labrador as a "practice" for raising kids. The story talked about how the couple managed to take care of the dog, Marley despite its problem behaviors - chewing anything, drinking in the toilet, etc. until they had three children. Marley was even expelled in a dog training school! However, the story showed how a dog in the form of Marley, taught the family about being together, loyalty, trust, and love.

As most dog lovers know, a year for a dog means seven years for a human. So it is natural that dogs die early than their human companions. The stories talked about how Martin and Marley suffered the same fate with Martin living for at the most 10 years while Marley 12 though the second book talked about the heartbreaking events leading to Marley's death - by "sleeping". A vet usually injects a drug to induce sleep until the dog is not breathing anymore - which is actually humane since pain is very very very very minimal.

I was crying profusely while I was reading the part where Marley was put to sleep. For humans, its not likely that parents bury their sons or daughters. It is usually the other way around. But in these cases, its the parents or owners who bury their pets or "babies" as what I call mine.

I remembered my baby, Fritz, a german shepherd back at home. I mean, it is inevitable that he will go first before me since my friends would tell me that I have to be prepared when that time comes because they saw how much I love my baby Fritz. And its too early to think about it, I think. Fritz is only 1.6 years old... which translates to 10.5 years old in human age. But death is one of the certain things in life... aside from taxes. So when my mom bought two cemetery lost for the family to build a mausoleum, I asked her that I want to buy another lot. She was bewildered since she asked who do I want to be buried there - since there is already the fact that I most probably will not have a family (wife and children) of my own. So I told her that I want to bury Fritz there someday. And then she stopped asking questions.

Fritz, my baby, is a handsome dog! He may be hard headed at times but I know he's ready to fight for me. I remember one time that a friend of mine wanted to greet me up close from my back. I was petting my baby but when my friend got close, Fritz jumped towards my friend (which Fritz does not know)! Luckily, I was able to get hold of Fritz's collar or else my friend would be going to the hospital due to multiple bites. Fritz was just like Marley (the Lab in the second story). Fritz loves to chew! He even chewed my expensive slippers, cellphones (five times!!!!), and clothes! But luckily, he got over chewing objects. He even peed in my bed!!!!! But despite his misgivings, I still love my baby Fritz (even if he stands 5'4 on two hind legs and weighs 34 kilos).

I really miss Fritz. He was with me ever since he was 8 weeks old. And he always sleeps beside me on my bed, everyday!!!! There was one time where I slept on the living room floor because I was so drunk and I was not able to go to my room. Lo and behold! I woke up at five in the morning, with my mom smiling at me. I got confused and then she pointed something beside me sleeping on the floor with his head on the throw pillow. I saw my baby Fritz, sleeping beside me!!! And he was only 12 weeks old at that time! Wow! This dog surely is loyal!!! Whenever I go, he is beside me - on the bed, on the chair, on the sofa and even in the bathroom!!!

Gawd!!!! I really am missing fritz...

Last saturday, I received a call from the speech pathologist of the Australian International School here in Jakarta. He (ABet), talked to the owner and they discussed the possibility of putting up an intervention center there. The owner asked ABet to tell me to make a proposal. However, we will have a discussion first prior to making the proposal so that I would know what they want for the school. I was so elated and this was a silver lining for my worry whether I could stay here in Jakarta or move to Dubai or back to Manila. ABet also said that if ever, I will be heading the intervention center there. Wow!

To make the matter for the better, I received a call from AMet and Tina (the parents of Nathan) who are in Dubai for their pre-visit, they asked me to send them my updated CV since there is a good special school there in need of an Occupational Therapist. So, I sent them my updated CV. Wow! Another opportunity for me to choose from.

Though both of these are not yet in the bag, its still more than a flicker of hope of what I am supposed to be doing. Its more than a silver lining. Its like the saying, when it rains, it pours. And yes, I thank God for those and for everything. For as long as you believe that He will make everything OK, that's faith. And no matter how big or small it is, its still faith.

last wednesday, I only had 135K rupiah in my wallet. That was all that's left since I have not yet received this month's salary and I still have to ask a friend for the loan he owes me. Anyway, I was worried since I need to ride a taxi for six more times this week until Friday. I do not know how could I make it suffice until then.

But luckily, the owner of the house that I slept at Tuesday night asked the driver to drive me to my destination! Wow! First miracle. Next worry is going back to the apartment after my next session that morning. It usually takes 40K rupiah from that place to the apartment. And I only have 35K small bills. Luckily, when I got to the apartment, the taxi only cost about 34K!!! Whew!!! Second miracle! That night, I was to go to the church to hear mass so I need to ride a taxi to and from. Luckily, the church was near the office of the dad of Nathan (the family Im staying with), so they asked me to use the car (with the driver since I do not know how to drive a manual transmission and i am not used to RHD cars) and just pick up AMet. Wow, again! Third miracle. I do not have to spend my remaining 100K!! Anyway, I just consumed 90K of the 100K for transportation today (Friday) and still have 10K to spend (but i can only buy a pack of cigarettes for that amount). Nevertheless, I can consider those as 3 miracles since I was worried about how much I had left considering the foreseen expenses. I guess God make ways one way or another. Its just about trusting HIM for those who believe in God. So that's what I will do about my decision of whether to stay here in jakarta, go back to manila, or go to dubai. I'll just leave it up to him.

And yes, there are still many miracles happening not just to me, but to everybody, whether big or small. Well, me, being able to type and post this on the internet is already a miracle!

I just spent my whole weekend pondering whether what to do with my professional life. Last May, I just left my practice in Manila just to be here in Jakarta at the request of a former client of mine so that I could have therapy with their eldest child and some other kids here. Now, the father has an offer in Dubai and he is seriously telling me that they want me to go with them as their private therapist. However, inasmuch as Dubai is a very nice country (with the Palm Jameira and all), not to mention they are a tax-free country, I am having second thoughts about going with them.

I have many to thoughts about transferring (again!) my practice. First, Dubai is far from Manila which would mean a very costly travel from there and back to Manila aside from the fact that it is not easy to go home as compared to Jakarta. Which would mean that my friends and family can easily visit me anytime they want to. Second, he (AMet) just told me that they want me to go with them though an offer for me usually includes everything (housing and accomodation, professional fees, vacation, etc.). So there is still much room to speculate about everything aside from their intention. In addition, he said that I can bring my baby dog (a german shepherd) in a noncommittal fashion. Nevertheless, money is not a problem with them when it comes to their eldest child who needs therapy. Third, I would be leaving some of my kids (or clients) to some, here in Jakarta. HOwever, with them gone sometime in the future, my income would not be as usual since they get most of my services here which brings me to my fourth. I have not yet received any news with one of the therapists here in Jakarta (a schoolmate of mine though we were eons of years apart by batch) who has a clinic here about me working in her clinic which would be a big help to augment my income here (if ever AMet's family leaves for Dubai). Not that I pressure her or want her to fix everything up since it is Ramadhan and it is a busy month for them (Muslims). But it still adds to the uncertainties that surrounds my practice here. Fifth, Dubai is a country where it is very hot!!! and cold!!! Well, mostly hot. And I do not like that. Aside from the fact that once you got to their tourist spots, which I believe is less than 10, there is nothing more but the vast land of dessert. What do you do in the dessert? Dig oil? Play golf? hahaha... Sixth, there are a lot of Filipinos in Dubai just like here in Jakarta which I guess would make it an easy transition and developing an "at home" feeling.

I asked a few friends of mine about it and even my family. My mom told me as well as my sister that I should do whatever I want. My colleagues and friends (3/3 though I have not asked all yet) said that I should stay here or go back to Manila since it is hard to be tied up with one family to give my services to. I tried praying and wanted to ask for a sign, but I have not yet decided what sign to ask though.

Should I just go back to Manila? Should I go with them (AMet) to Dubai? Should I stay here and slug it out in this no-competition zone of the globe when it comes to therapy? The decision is not yet asked of this time but it is still best to ponder about the pros and cons about it, right?

Or should I say, as the saying goes, just cross the bridge when I get there?